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8 novembre 2006

Le jeu du dragon

Je m'aperçois d'un truc rigolo. Ceux qui savent  des choses sont des chieurs, et il faut prendre son air tout gentil pour en  tirer quelque chose. Je le sais, parce que j'ai joué les deux rôles. Autrefois,  du temps de ma jeunesse (ah là là), je trouvais que les gens qui avaient le plus  de choses à m'apprendre étaient de vieux chieurs caractériels, mais je voulais  bien montrer patte blanche voire ramper par terre pour bénéficier de leur  savoir. Et je voyais d'autres "jeunes" autour de moi, qui ne voulaient pas faire  la même chose, et qui donc ne pouvaient bénéficier de la manne divine parce  qu'ils étaient foutus à la porte avant. J'attribuais ce côté chieur à une faille  dans le caractère de mes professeurs de circonstance. Je me disais que c'était  bien dommage mais pas si grave.
Mais voilà que maintenant que je sais  quelques petites choses, je me mets à faire pareil... Ce n'est pas pour le  plaisir de faire chier le monde. C'est quelque chose qui se met automatiquement  en place afin de filtrer ceux qui peuvent bénéficier du "savoir", et ceux qui ne  le doivent pas. J'observe donc avec le plus grand amusement le comportement des  petits scarabées, ainsi que leur choix. J'admire beaucoup ceux qui se prennent  héroïquement des cailloux sur la tronche et sont capables malgré cela de rester  tout gentils pour amadouer le dragon que je suis. Je n'en conclus nullement  qu'ils sont inférieurs parce qu'ils courbent la tête. J'en conclus surtout  qu'ils sont intelligents, parce qu'ils ont compris, tel Indiana Jones, que si on  ne passe pas la porte à genoux, on se fait couper la tête. Je le sais pour  l'avoir beaucoup fait moi-même. On ne peut recevoir qu'en se mettant plus bas  que celui de qui on veut recevoir. ça ne veut pas dire que celui qui se met plus  haut se croit plus haut, ni que celui qui se met plus bas se prend pour un ver  de terre. C'est apparemment une règle. Quand je veux recevoir quelque chose, je  me mets à genoux, et quand je vois arriver quelqu'un qui veut quelque chose, je  fais le dragon. C'est normal. Si la personne vient avec son arrogance, ce n'est  pas pour demander, c'est pour voler, et bien mal acquis ne profite jamais. Je me  vois cracher le feu à une certaine hauteur :"Allez vas-y, passe dessous. Si tu  passes, t'auras ce que tu veux. Si tu passes pas, tant pis pour toi". Et j'en  vois qui passent en sachant très bien ce qu'ils font. Des petits malins ! Mais  comme c'est la règle de donner à celui qui passe dessous, ils obtiennent ce  qu'ils veulent. Ce n'est qu'une question de convenances, rien de plus. Le jeu  n'est pas de cramer tous les candidats, uniquement ceux qui ont le cou trop  raide. En réalité, la chose ne peut fonctionner qu'entre égaux qui se  reconnaissent, et celui qui a le cou raide se croit supérieur, c'est un fait.  Cela ne peut donc pas fonctionner avec lui. Inversement, quelqu'un qui courbe la  tête ne nous signifie pas que nous sommes supérieurs, mais simplement qu'une  relation d'égalité sera possible avec lui. Au moins à un certain niveau. 
Mettons-nous dans la position de celui qui apprend : il est évident que  celui qui nous enseigne nous croit son égal, sinon il ne perdrait pas son temps.  Il n'y a que l'arrogant pour croire qu'une transmission peut passer entre un  supérieur et un inférieur.

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Enseignements de Rudi

Fear
We have the capacity in our minds to create that which we are most afraid of; in the same way that we bury some ignorance like a grain of sand inside the shell of an oyster and build around it until we come up with the end product, which in this case is not a pearl.

God
It is finally this consciousness that allows a human being to feel God as the constant energy that is absorbed by all of the chakras, filling him with sweetness and joy. Not feeling happy is only the result of not being in tune with this force and not having the consciousness to contain it. For whatever reason we fail in holding onto energy, we must look to ourselves. We cannot blame anybody or anything. It is only our lack of capacity to hold that which is given.

Revelations

In all teachings, the temptations that appear during the revelation period are those things we identify with, that take away the energy or content from the experience. It is the courage to put the bottom on the void, so that the incoming energy is not lost during any experience, that is required. This enables a person to grow endlessly, by surrendering content as fast as it manifests itself.

Seekers
It is a remarkable event when somebody presents a situation that exposes their real need. It is rare when even half the truth is given. Usually a situation is distorted beyond recognition. It is as if somebody is saying to me that if I can dig out the real situation, maybe they will allow me to help them. When a situation occasionally is presented in all its nakedness, it is only because the person is defenseless at a particular moment. As soon as they have one stitch to put on their back, they again retreat into themselves, distorting what they said and what they think you said. The ability to hear and see is rare in this world. It only exists in somebody who truly wishes to grow. This has not, unfortunately, been the attitude of most seekers. So few succeed in reaching their goal that it is safe to assume that there are few who honestly pursue a spiritual life, and even then, very few teachers who cater to anything that brings the realism that allows for enlightenment.

Spirituality

Spirituality is not about being where you think you should be. It is not about being where you want to be. Spirituality is about being on the highest point of an ascending energy that keeps growing and growing.
As this energy grows, it completely destroys every level of truth as you live it. This does not mean the truth that has been destroyed was not real. It was real for the level on which you existed before. With students, I am not interested in how long they are with me; I am just interested in one thing: whether or not they are strong enough to break up the horizontal level and continue growing. For myself, I do not want to limit myself by what I was. I do not think, "I did all this work to get to here." That is baloney. That is making a drama of your life and trying to build an image for yourself. The point is to keep growing. It is to have the courage to keep growing, even if it pulls apart the structure of your life. Then it is freeing you. There is nothing wrong with pulling apart the structure. What is wrong is to build yourself into a coffin and then stay there and try to justify it. Either you are working to live on a higher level all the time and to have a rebirth all the time, or you are trying to find justification for staying the way you are.
The whole point of what we do is to destroy matter, which is this horizontal plane we sit on: the earth. It is to translate this physical and material matter into spiritual force. This is our work.

Surrender
You sit down. Inside you, what is going on? You want to be right. "I'm a nice guy, how could this person do this to do me? How could someone take advantage of me in the business world," or "How can somebody not love me? Don't they understand what I did?" Inside you, these muscles close up; they are protecting you. They are protecting your ego, protecting the image you have of yourself. You sit down to take your breath, and you find that something has robbed you of your heart. What robbed you of your heart ? The need to be right. These muscles do not want to open. They would rather you were safe and secure behind the wall than outside the wall.
Surrendering is opening all the muscles. This is the real test of your surrender in a situation. Can you breathe ? Does the throat open to receive the energy ? Are you free to receive this energy and open and see what your condition really is ? If you find out you are constricted in your heart, you have a pain in your back, or you can't get the air down, what does it mean? It means you are closed. What closed you? It does not matter what closed you, you do not have to find the rational reason, you just have to open. You sit and work, and you breathe. I do not have that problem anymore, but I used to sit and take that breath six hundred times in one day, sometimes, to begin to feel a little crevice start to open. If you are closed, you are dead. You can't be right if you are closed. Can a closed person know what he or she did or did not do ? So, if you find that you are closed, you have to drop the whole issue of whether the other person is or is not right.


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